


Pretty Lies

by sodenoshirayuki_23



Category: Joker Game (Anime)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-25
Updated: 2016-06-25
Packaged: 2018-07-18 04:52:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7300327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sodenoshirayuki_23/pseuds/sodenoshirayuki_23
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Night before Miyoshi's departure for Germany.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pretty Lies

**Author's Note:**

> I lost a friend, and this came to mind. 
> 
> It might seem a little ooc, I'm sorry about that. 
> 
> But, enjoy!

He had been informed of what and where his mission will be. Everything is already settled. 

 

Everything but **_one thing_. **

 

The room was quiet,  no other sound can be heard.  Not even any snores or any noise coming from crickets. 

 

Nothing. 

 

Standing in front of an occupied bed, Miyoshi's staring down at Sakuma's slumbering face. Dark hair sprawled all over the soft pillows. The usual tough face devoid of any furrowed eyebrows or any expressions at all. He's just there, sleeping peacefully. Eyelids closed but moving. 

 

_Is he dreaming? Dreaming of what?  Of me?_

 

Miyoshi fought the urge to smile,  and he _almost_ succeeded. 

 

_Impossible,  he won't._

 

He _failed (which is rare because he never fails)_ he smiled down at the lieutenant. 

 

Trained to act without making any unnecessary sound, Miyoshi turns his back to the bed and aims towards the door. 

 

"Miyoshi."

 

He was sure he moved with much caution and years of practice. His eyes are slightly widened but he's glad Sakuma didn't see. Gaining his usual facade, Miyoshi faces him with the same smile plastered on his face. 

 

"Lieutenant,  I thought you were sleeping."

 

"I was." Sakuma's eyes are fixed on Miyoshi, as if studying him;  but he fails nonetheless. Or did he?

 

"I see. My apologies. Did I wake you up?" Miyoshi closes his eyes,  not looking nearly apologetic.

 

"I heard about your mission." Sakuma clearly ignored his question. 

 

Miyoshi's eyes shot open and directed straight to Sakuma,  "They sure catch news fast--"

 

"Not really.  I don't trust that you didn't keep this confidential."

 

Raising an eyebrow,  Miyoshi continues to stare at Sakuma, demanding for answers. 

 

"I was just interested enough to know."

 

"Oh?" Miyoshi's lips quirk up in a manner he didn't really expect his body will show. "Since when did the lieutenant had an interest on what I do?"

 

Sakuma stands up and approaches the shorter man.  "For a while now."

 

No one said a word for a minute or so.

With a short distance between them, Miyoshi's gaze are locked with Sakuma's.  

"Is that so?" Miyoshi replies,  for a moment there,  Sakuma thought he saw mirth on the spy's eyes. But it was quickly replaced with something he was used to do. 

 

"Yeah."

 

"I need to pack my things now while the others are out. It can be quite noisy with them here. Is there anything else that interests you?"

 

~~_That you might want to tell me..._~~

 

Staring right at Miyoshi's unreadable eyes, Sakuma didn't reply but he just grabbed the back of the shorter man's head and slammed their lips together.

 

A moment of surprise fills Miyoshi's being as he slightly tensed, but he didn't resist.  He could resist and throw Sakuma to the other side of the room,  but he didn't. He chose not to.  Instead,  he slowly relaxes and kisses back. 

 

The kiss is warm,  just like Sakuma's personality,  his presence and his whole being. Unlike him,  who's often regarded as cold and unfeeling of other's opinions.  Seen as a perfectionist, a narcissist or even a sadist. Being with other spies seems quite cold too,  or it could just be his thoughts. 

 

Sakuma started by just pressing their lips together,  until he gently bites Miyoshi's lower lip.  It made the latter smile into the kiss at the thought that Sakuma didn't want to hurt him even in the slightest way possible.

That smile made way for Sakuma to enter and explore his mouth to his will,  but Miyoshi could still feel the gentleness of the kiss. 

 

It's sudden,  unexpected. But the way Sakuma does it makes Miyoshi think it was done that way to express sadness,  hidden feelings and longing. 

 

And perhaps, the slight thought of not wanting to let Miyoshi go to his mission. 

 

Miyoshi pulls away, Sakuma stares at him with a worried look as if to wonder if he was hurt,  or if he didn't like it. 

 

The shorter man chuckles and looks away, "No,  I did like it.  Don't worry. I just.."

 

_I just don't think this will work out._

 

A pause,  but Sakuma seems to have noticed it.

 

"But that's still enough,  isn't it?"

 

Miyoshi flinched and he almost snaps his head to stare at Sakuma, this time with no mask of anything.  He did look surprised. 

 

_It is probably too late to refract that reaction but..._

"I don't know what you're talking about,  Sakuma-san." He said with a small laugh. It seemed forced. 

 

 _Ah,  I sounded ridiculous_. 

 

Yet Sakuma smiled solemnly at him. 

 

"It's alright. That's enough, isn't it?"

 

Miyoshi felt sadness.  Real sadness this time. He didn't know why and how Sakuma saw right through him,  when he was unable to all this time. But he continued to gaze at Sakuma.

 

He gave up and smiled.

 

"Yeah,  it is enough..."

 

With that,  Sakuma approached him again before closing the distance between them. They kissed once again. 

 

Until it somehow led to the two of them on the bed. 

 

••••

 

Miyoshi opens up his eyes to see that Sakuma has finally fallen asleep (but Miyoshi himself didn't sleep,  he _can't_ sleep. He just pretended to until the other is sure he is) after their making of love.  

 

_Is it really love shared by couples?  What is love,  even?_

 

He laughs bitterly at that thought. 

 

~~_Feelings aren't needed for spies. Ties should be cut shortly.  Love isn't any exception._ ~~

 

He repeatedly echoed that through his mind all this time.  But this time, it seemed useless as he gazes at the slumbering man beside him. Missing of any clothing just like him, and covered only in a thick and warm blanket. Just like Sakuma. 

 

_Well,  he was thick._

Miyoshi chuckles at his own thought, but he continues to stare at Sakuma. 

 

His peaceful face almost makes Miyoshi want to touch it just to move away those stray hairstrands. Or just to caress his cheeks. 

 

Halfway reaching to it,  Miyoshi refrains so. He returns his hand close to his chest as he watches the rise and fall of Sakuma's own, indicating now that he truly is asleep. 

 

Miyoshi notices those closed eyelids moving up and down, side by side.  

 

_Is he dreaming again?_

 

 

_What is he dreaming of?_

 

 

_Is it me?_

 

 

_Of course not._

 

He didn't know why,  but he felt this immeasurable feeling of sorrow that made him close to shedding tears.  But no,  That isn't Miyoshi. That isn't him. 

 

 _This isn't me_. 

 

Miyoshi closes his eyes and thought of the possibility that Sakuma is indeed dreaming of him--

 

"Miyoshi...please don't leave..."

 

The addressed man quickly snaps his eyes towards the sleeping man,  only to see him still sleeping. 

 

_Oh,  he's just mumbling._

 

_But he is indeed dreaming of me..._

_And wishing I won't leave._

 

 

Staring right into Sakuma's muscular figure, Miyoshi thought his vision became blurry for a while.  He reached for his eyes and found no moisture.

 

It's just his imagination.

 _After all,  spies don't cry_.

 

Instead,  Miyoshi snuggles closer,  an act he didn't think he'd do without acting. And hoped for a moment that time will become slow,  even if he thinks it's not possible. 

 

After five minutes, he stands up carefully and washed himself to prepare. 

 

••••

 

Before leaving,  he walked over to the still slumbering Sakuma,  and does a thing spies shouldn't even think of doing.

 

He kissed Sakuma's forehead.  It was a chaste kiss,  but with lots of feelings he'll probably give for the last time. 

 

"I'll return,  Sakuma-san." He whispers,  but it's clearly a lie. 

 

~~_When I do return,  I hope I can finally understand and return your and my feelings by then, too._ ~~

~~~~

'Last time',  and Miyoshi didn't know why he thought of that.

 

"Don't you want to wake him up and properly say goodbye?"

 

He pulls away and sees Kaminaga standing by the door with his arms crossed over his chest. The man is leaning his back on the door frame. Miyoshi shakes his head. 

 

"No,  the lieutenant is tired.  Let him rest."

 

Miyoshi gathers his things and heads towards the door.

 

"Miyoshi." Kaminaga says when they are shoulder to shoulder. "Have a safe trip."

 

The shorter man grins,  his usual self showing,  "It is never safe. You of all people should know,  Kaminaga."

 

Kaminaga snorts and Miyoshi walks away. 

 

••••

 

Miyoshi never came back. 

 

Sakuma dreamed of Miyoshi that night he said his farewells.  

 

_"I'll return,  Sakuma-san."_

 

_**It was a pretty lie.**  _

_Just like Miyoshi himself,  whom Sakuma didn't even know of his real name or real background. Yet against all those,  Miyoshi was indeed beautiful..._

**Author's Note:**

> This turned out longer than I thought.


End file.
